The non-Abby viewpoint ...

I'd been resisting writing anything here for a number of weeks. Mainly it centered around my own emotional state when it comes to fatherhood and Lucy's condition.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a story on Olympian Jared Frayer for the upcoming issue of USA Wrestler Magazine, a publication my company puts out for its 180,000 members. Frayer, a 33-year-old from Clearwater, Fla., who was a two-time collegiate All-American at Oklahoma, told the story about his daughter, Khloe, and her condition - Down syndrome. While Lucy was in the clear for Down's, his story hit close to home. All the things he and his wife Nicole went through echoed what Abby and I were encountering as first-time parents.

Shortly before I wrote the story about Frayer, one of the local Colorado wrestling organizers told me his daughter was born with hydro. Thing is, they didn't know it until after she was born ... like six months after. What Jay told me was reassuring. His daughter is now 12 years old, and other than wearing glasses, she's just fine. This was something that calmed my worries. Lucy will be just fine. I believe that.

I work a lot, too much at times. As Abby said in her previous post, I was set to go to Akron to work a tournament, fly back on Monday, then turn around and work a major wrestling fundraiser in New York City. I'd be home about 12 hours during that nine day stretch.

I've tried to remain calm, confident and stable during this whole situation. As a soon-to-be parent, there's no limit to the thoughts that can pass through one's mind. Unfortunately, not all of them have been good. I guess that's part of human nature. Fortunately, I've maintained my composure. Tending to Abby in the hospital has helped with that.

Two weeks ago, I went in to the doc to get some meds to take care of the bronchitis I picked up while in Virginia. He prescribed me some blood pressure medication. It's been getting a workout with all the trips up to Denver, even before Abby was checked into the hospital.

I can sleep anywhere, but today I started getting that crabby cabin fever from being in a very sterile room for four days. What doesn't help matters is some of the major streets in Denver were closed off for a weekend festival, which made a normal two-mile trip around town to pick up dinner an 30-45 minute ordeal. They don't make GPS devices with buttons that say "pick another route, this road is closed."

I'm so sick of "recalculating."

I came home tonight. I'm going to wash some clothes, because my bag, already packed for Akron, had exhausted its clean clothes. I'll wash some of Abby's things and run into the office in the morning, make sure my coworkers have the necessary equipment to run the event in NYC (Times Square, big time!), but then drop by Dish, pick up some things for Abby and then camp out again at the hospital.

We've been told so many things from the nurses and docs, it's made my mind spin without any signs of stopping. I mean, we could have a baby tomorrow, or this weekend. Some of my coworkers have set up a baby shower this coming weekend for Abby -- this was of course before any of these hospital "visits" were scheduled.

I've been pretty quiet about this entire thing. My side of the family wasn't entirely in the loop with what was going on with Lucy, but since my talk with Jay about his daughter, I've been a bit more open, but this is not easy, as I'm sure you folks can understand.

For as much as I talk with Abby about how we're feeling as a marital unit and our relationship, I really keep my emotions hidden. You might be able to see it on my face, but I really don't open up too much. We were keeping the baby thing off Facebook, which we did for six months, until the care package arrived from Abby's awesome friends.

I realize I'm rambling, but all I can do is continue to try to remain positive, rub Abby's feet, laugh at her hospital-issue bathing suit and keep myself occupied with Abby and addicting games on Facebook.

I was occupied with work this weekend, even though I didn't make the trip and that sometimes helped my sanity, and in other cases, added to the agitation of not being in control of my own world. Well, that's life, right?

Abby's been great through all this. They keep asking her the same questions, but her spirits remain up. Little Lucy won't wait until July, that much is certain.

"Oh the places you will go ..."

JB